Meet Antonie

“Life will be better when…”

That’s the story I would tell myself almost my whole life –– that I will be happier WHEN I will just get this one last thing. Be it a new friend, a different job, marriage, kids, a better school for my children, etc.

Now, from the outside, I got everything I asked for. But did it change how I felt on the inside? No. I still felt frustrated, angry, stressed, overwhelmed, unappreciated, excluded and alone. These emotions went away for a while when I managed to soothe myself with some kind of distraction, like getting together with friends or having a fun outing. But they kept coming back, over and over again. There was no escape.My emotional state was like riding a rollercoaster. I had times of great fun and happiness, only to find myself in a deep valley of depression a few weeks later. I could never understand why it happened to me. Why me? Everybody else seemed happy. Also, everybody around me thought I was happy.

I knew that something needed to change. Otherwise, I would not only keep hurting myself but also everybody around me, especially my family.

In 2016, an email showed up in my Gmail account inviting me to a free women-centered workshop, emphasizing the lessons of how to unleash your potential. That was it –– I’d found what I needed, a community of like-minded women who could relate to each other.

For the first time in my life, I felt fully seen, heard, and, most importantly, I realized that I’m not the only one struggling with myself and life.

And from that point on, my life took an unexpectedly awesome turn, as I decided to get certified as a transformational coach and facilitator. It was the only way for me to keep on this path of learning and discovering who I really was and what wants to emerge.

20 years ago, when I started practicing yoga – that’s about the time I’d say when I got actively involved with spirituality. I had very inspiring yoga teachers, who not only taught me the postures (and supported me in getting comfortable in the uncomfortable postures), but also introduced me to the benefits of meditation.

I started to inhale any kind of wisdom I could get hold of by reading books and attending workshops and seminars.

That’s how I stumbled upon the simple and ancient healing method from the Q’ero Incan Shamans in Peru. I was fascinated.

I realized that besides working on a physical, emotional, and soulful level to bring healing to my inner wounds, I needed another level of intervention. Getting certified as a shamanic energy medicine practitioner gave me the tools and expertise to engage more fully with the vital, emanating life force we are all part of. As a result, we can all live in a better relationship with everything around us.

In hindsight, I’ve always been a spiritual person seeking answers from different sources. I always felt there’s more out there. I just didn’t know what it was. As a young child, I imagined Jesus showing up behind the clouds as the sunrays fell down onto the earth.

There are many ways to be a spiritual person, and I believe you don’t have to go to church to do that. You can create your own routine of connecting with God, Buddha, Spirit, Universe, The Great Mystery – whatever you want to call it.

My own upbringing in a Christian environment was very rigid and didn’t make any sense to me. Now I have a different understanding. For instance, I can see that praying the rosary is a beautiful way of meditation. The repetition of the prayers, calling on Mother Mary, it can be a very healing thing to do.

In 2003, I discovered the amazing quilts of Gee’s Bend, created by African-American women living in a very remote area in Alabama. I was intrigued by the unconventional, creative design they made using only the fabric they had on hand. It was very unique. This fascination then drew me to an improv quilting workshop at the Detroit Institute of Art, where I learned how to create a heart-shaped piece with just strips of fabric and no pattern to follow.

I was sold on this kind of handiwork, where I could create something beautiful but I wasn’t limited by rules and perfectionism. This work brought out my joy and playfulness with colors and fabric.

Exploring ways in how to incorporate handiwork into spiritual and life coaching workshops for women, I remembered the quilting book with the title, “Cut-Loose Quilts,” which was very inspiring to me in the beginning of my quilting journey.

And that’s how the name for my business came up. And to be completely candid, ‘z’ came in because Cut Loose as a domain name was already taken. I like it as Cut Looze with a ‘z,’ like my last name initial — it makes it different; it makes it uniquely me.

Fulfilled, proud, happy.

Let’s start with the basics. We are all surrounded by a luminous energy field (LEF), also called light body or aura. It is a matrix that envelops and informs the physical structure of all living beings. Our LEF contains imprints that originate from personal and ancestral memories, early-life trauma, and wounds from former lifetimes that inform our body of how we live, how we age, how we heal, and how we might die.

These imprints are like invisible computer programs operating in the background that create a map of our life, an internal blueprint. This blueprint defines our neural pathways and how we function in day-to-day life. Shamans all over the world believe that if we wish to change the outer world, we must begin by changing our internal blueprint. This is done by healing and removing the imprints in your LEF.

As a shamanic energy medicine practitioner, I track the energetics behind a client’s issue, find the imprint in the LEF, extract the heavy energy, and upgrade the LEF by infusing it with the primordial life force energy. It is amazing what happens for my clients during that purifying process. They can feel the heavy energy being lifted and sense a different vibration entering their body. It can show up as a sensation of warmth permeating over areas of their body, images or colors may appear, even sudden insights pop into their mind that they didn’t think of before. The experience is very individual.

Reviewing the experience afterward, we come up with practical steps for the client to reinstall a new way of being, all while supporting the clearing of the heavy energy. And as is known in neuroscience, it requires at least 28 days of discipline and consistency to install new neuropathways in your brain to develop a new way of being.

Being certified as a transformational coach, I’ve been introduced to various spiritual practices from different teachings. And I keep adding on to it. For example, in the last year, I’ve started doing ancestral work. A lot of issues we’re struggling with, they didn’t start with us. They are sort of handed down from our ancestors, and can be really, really old and tough on us to break free from. If we manage to solve these issues, though, we are not only helping our ancestors to heal old wounds, but also allowing the generations that are yet to come from our lineage to live a better life.

Learning more about ancestral work, my mentor introduced me to working with an ancestral altar. It’s a beautiful way to honor our ancestors, dead and alive. You can talk to them, ask them questions, or ask for assistance in any matter. They are here for you. They want to help you live a better life, a life you love. It helped me tremendously to let go of resentment toward them, find forgiveness, and appreciate the gifts and skills that I received from them.

There’s a beautiful energy-healing practice I like to use to bring healing energy to a dear friend who might be in distress.

First, I find a quiet place for myself and connect with my breath until I feel relaxed. During this process, I like to put my right hand on my heart space, as it creates a soothing effect.

Next, I think of what the person would need right now. Is it love? Is it tolerance? Is it understanding?

Then I think of a time when I experienced that myself. I connect with the energy of it, and I imagine sending that energy to the person. I don’t have any expectations of what the person will do with it. Maybe they are open to receiving the support, maybe not. That’s up to the person to decide what to do with the healing energy. Yet, the intention to give my support freely has a tremendous effect on me, the knowledge that I am offering help to someone has a powerful effect on my soul.

Bringing gratitude into my life is another powerful practice for me.

You can’t be upset and grateful at the same time. It helps to get yourself out of your negative mindset and be more open to the gifts and opportunities that already surround you. All you have to do is open your heart, mind and eyes to them.

First thing in the morning, before I even get up, I greet the tree outside my window in my mind. This is my way of giving thanks. I’m grateful for another day. Then, throughout the day, I savor unexpected moments and situations. I’m aware of gifts that come my way, not taking them or anything for granted. I try to find opportunities even in those ‘bad moments’ that we all experience, rather than being angry. And in the evening, I reflect on the day and express gratitude for all I’ve experienced and the lessons I learned.

The practice of gratitude strengthens the ability to notice the good. It allows you to soften your awareness, be open to the little wonders around you, and bring in some joy and peace. And it raises your vibration, bringing you closer to making your manifestations become reality.

I challenge you to make a list of 3 things daily that you’re grateful for and either journal about each one or repeat the following phrase like a mantra in the morning or evening: “I’m grateful for another day. I’m grateful for myself taking good care of myself. I’m grateful for the cup of coffee that I’ll get to enjoy this morning.” Allow your senses to experience what you are grateful for, and you’ll see that you will attract more of what you are grateful for. It really is that simple.